Don’t Take Your Phone (A Mini-Adventure)

Quality time with the kids is so much easier when your phone is left behind at home.

I remember doing bushwalks and visiting national parks as a kid, and my parents never took a phone. Back then we didn’t have mobile phones. We may have taken a camera, but usually not. When we were out exploring, playing, ‘in nature’, we really were all there. Fast forward to now and adventures for kids couldn’t be more connected - but not to nature.

Honestly, this post comes from a recent experience. I’d planned a fun adventure day with my son and as we were driving there I realised, in the morning rush, my phone was still at home on the charger. I sucked my breath in and bit my lip. The roads were busy at that time of day, so I’d have to find a safe place to turn around. We had a swimming lesson to go to first and I didn’t know if I could get the phone and still make it to the lesson first. I kept driving, feeling both anxious and incredibly curious.

These were the thoughts going through my head:

It’s perfect weather, the photos will be amazing… I won’t get ANY of it.

I can’t even use this adventure for my Instagram feed, since I won’t be able to show anything…what is the point?

Maybe I could take him to a playground instead, and save the adventure for when I have my phone.

WAIT…Would I REALLY skip an adventure with my son just because I didn’t have my phone?!?!

What was wrong with me! I hadn’t realised how much sharing our adventures on Instagram and my website had influenced me. I felt like the whole point of going was to be able to get photos. And not just for Instagram, but for our family photo books which I make every year.

And what if I needed to ring someone? What if I missed a call from my daughter’s school?

Surely they could contact my husband. And surely if I had an emergency, I would find help from someone nearby.

Isn’t the adventure day supposed to be about my son and I having fun together?

I met myself halfway. I would do the adventure with my son and then go back again another day to get pics. This figuring out the logistics, the riskiness of leaving part of my comfort zone behind – well it kind of added to the adventure of it all. Going somewhere with my son for the day without a connection to anyone else, it felt so strange.

It was the most glorious day. I can’t even explain it. Perfect autumn weather – cool days and warm sunshine. My son rode his bike, we climbed a hill, we fed some fish, we learned about some local animals and spotted a mouse and a garrirl (that’s the local Indigenous word for eagle, as my kids have been teaching me).

The whole time I kept wishing for my phone, to take photos, to capture moments, angles, views... it made me realise how often I get the phone out in front of my kids to get pictures of every little thing. I realised how much of a security it was for me, and also how much of a distraction from the moment. With my phone gone, I was able to fully engage with my son, give him my attention, and not push him beyond the day’s enjoyable limits.

When we got to the top of the hill, we didn’t keep going along the track, the part I really wanted to see. If I’d had my phone I would have pushed him further than he wanted to go, to get pictures, and it may have ruined it for us.

What I took away from this experience is that we are more connected to these devices than we should be. I don’t have photos of most of the places I went as a kid, or the things I did, but I do have memories. I think being present helps you to store something in your memory more completely.

Honestly, I’m disappointed I don’t have photos from that day. But I’m surprised at the interactions my son and I were able to have, because my hands and my mind were free. And when we got home I journalled about the morning and talked about it with my son. If my daughter (who is older) was with us, I would have got her to do a drawing. Sometimes my son and I make mini ‘books’ (like 6 pages) of things we do together, and we draw key moments and feelings of the adventure. These reflections help us remember it all better. The drawings prompt my memories as much as a photo could.

So I will save our adventure for another blog post, when we go back to get the photos and videos to go with it.

Instead, for now, I challenge you to a different type of adventure – an unconnected one.

Go somewhere you’ve never been and don’t take a phone. No cameras even. Just you and your family, together. Can you do it? Let me know how it goes!